3 Surprising Lessons from the Nativity's Silent Hero
Introduction: The Case of the Missing Father
Some years ago in a Texas college town, a pre-Christmas crime was committed. A group of young men were sitting around their rental house, enjoying some Christmas cheer and eggnog—or something similar—when the conversation turned to a local funeral home’s large, illuminated nativity display. As young men are prone to do, they began to rank the characters from most to least important.
The baby Jesus was unanimously number one, with Mary a close second. But after that, the logic got interesting. The angel came in third, the shepherds fourth, and the wise men fifth. In a tie for sixth place were Joseph and the donkey.
One student, unhappy with the abysmal ranking, argued passionately that Joseph, as the father, deserved better. But one of his housemates—the official “donkey defender,” in fact—shouted back, “You are crazy, man. Nobody cares about Joseph. He has a minor role... no speaking part. He's a virtually glorified extra. Why? We could go steal Joseph from that nativity display... and no one would even notice.”
Suddenly, every face in the room lit up. Under the cover of darkness, they trooped down to the funeral home, scaled the roof, and absconded with the figure of Joseph. They were wrong about one thing: he was missed. The prank received a chilly reception when the funeral home, the neighborhood, and indeed the entire town immediately noticed Joseph was gone. They were incensed and indignant. The local police even sent out an EPB that St. Joseph of Nazareth was missing and whoever had him “better return him to his rightful place or they would find themselves back at the funeral home.”
Stunned, the students realized the error of their ways. They penitently returned the strong, steady, silent figure to the funeral home’s doorstep. As a peace offering, they placed a box of chocolates in Joseph's hands and a note of apology, which he held for all to see. This story reveals a common misconception. Joseph is often seen as an "Average Joe," a background character. But as those students discovered, his role is more profound than it appears.
His Silence Preaches a Powerful Sermon
It's a surprising fact: in all of scripture, Joseph is never recorded as saying a single word. He doesn’t get a Broadway show tune like Mary, with her powerful, scene-stealing song. His posts do not go viral on social media. I’ve heard Joseph didn’t even have a Facebook page. He is the strong, steady, silent figure of the nativity story.
And perhaps that’s the point. Joseph’s lack of speaking parts forces us to focus entirely on his actions. His story is not told through what he says, but through what he does. His faith, his courage, and his character are demonstrated, not declared. His silence makes his actions resonate that much louder, offering a model of faithfulness for all of us, especially those of us who may not feel like we're worthy to be cast in the production.
Although Joseph's voice is never heard, his life preaches a powerful sermon we all need to hear. Trust God even when your path is unclear. Choose mercy even when you have been hurt. Be faithful even when no one sees, applauds, or understands.
His Quiet Courage Redefined Strength
Joseph’s actions reveal an uncommon courage rooted in radical obedience and unshakable faith. He consistently chose the path of faithfulness over fear, and mercy over pride. When God spoke to him, Joseph did not doubt or delay or defend. He just did what God asked him to do.
Consider what he did:
He chose compassion over punishment. When he learned his fiancée was pregnant, he was likely heartbroken and confused. Yet he chose mercy over pride and decided to let his former fiancée go quietly, protecting her dignity.
He obeyed God without hesitation. After a dream confirmed Mary's story, he stayed. He took Mary as his wife, embracing all the associated shame and ignoring the inevitable gossip.
He raised a son who was not biologically his. He loved and cared for Jesus, teaching him an honest trade.
He protected his family. When King Herod threatened his family, Joseph obeyed another dream and moved his household to Egypt to keep them safe.
Joseph shows us that true strength isn't loud, overbearing, or unyielding. His strength was strong enough to be gentle, manifest in selfless service. It was the strength to trust, obey, and love when it made no sense to the world.
You see, his is the story of a good man who wanted only to do the right thing, caught up in an impossible, unbelievable, and embarrassing situation.
His "Background" Role Was Essential
Many years ago, I was living in Austin, trying to become an actor. Unfortunately, there was another aspiring actor in town at the same time. His name was Matthew McConaughey. I know you'll find this hard to believe, but he kept getting cast, and I did not. As best I could tell, there was only one difference between us: he could act and I could not.
The ladies at my church took great delight in calling me “Father Bit-Part, Non-Speaking Ro Miller.” One day, I was working as an extra—my specialty—on a movie set. My friend Fred was there too. Being an extra meant sitting around all day, and at the end, they’d pay you fifty bucks, which even back then was not worth it.
I vividly remember all of us extras sitting around when the assistant to the assistant to the assistant wardrobe person walked over, looked condescendingly at us, and called out, “Atmosphere. Atmosphere. Are you here?”
Who you callin’ atmosphere, lady? I thought. As if we’re some sort of innocuous layer of gases surrounding the lead actors.
But my friend Fred spoke up. “Lady,” he said, “if you’re talking to us, talk to us like we matter.”
Fred’s words capture a profound truth. Even those without speaking parts are critical to the story. Joseph is the ultimate example. He demonstrates an inspiring willingness to play whatever part he is assigned and to step into the background so that God's dream can take center stage. His role, while quiet and often offstage, was absolutely essential.
Conclusion: The Power of Showing Up
The story of Joseph—the "Average Joe"—offers a powerful lesson on the profound impact of quiet faithfulness, steady courage, and unwavering mercy. His life is a testament to the idea that our importance isn't measured by the prominence of our role or the volume of our voice, but by our willingness to show up and do the right thing, even when no one is watching.
So today, let's celebrate the one who said nothing but spoke volumes, the man who stood quietly right beside Mary, held a child as his own in his arms, and said with his actions and with his love, life. Yes, Lord. Cast me.
